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On July 13th my mother passed away. On July 18th I had the privilege of
saying some things in tribute to my mother. In this months newsletter I
would like to share them with you. I am doing so with some reluctance. I
received some feedback recently that a subscriber thought my messages
were self serving. My goal is that each of my newsletters gives you a
chance to get something that will help you in your life and career. The
simple message this month is to take time to love and appreciate all the
significant people in your life. One of my preferred ways of sending
this message is to share personal stories that illustrate a point. Please
indulge me.
Thank you for coming here today to celebrate the life of our mom and your
friend Jean MacDonald. On Thursday July 13th heaven got another angel.
But the lucky thing for us is that we had her here on this planet since
February 23, 1917. What a life!
Our mother was not a tall woman. Although she measured close to 5 feet
tall at one point (and that might be generous), in recent years she had
shrunken considerably. I have a picture that I took last summer as she
was modeling a new summer dress. She looked so cute in the picture and
just over her right shoulder was the doorknob. I dont know if there is
such a thing as a cute meter, but between her diminutive stature and
pleasing personality she would have been right off of it.
A few years ago she was in the hospital after a heart attack and the
doctors wanted her to get out of the bed and start walking. They got her
out to the hall and asked her to start walking. Her two little legs
started moving like they were on the bottom of a windup toy. The nurses
said, Jean, we wanted you to walk, not scurry. With a little smile and a
little laugh she looked at the nurse and said Alright dear. She was cute
and as I said earlier she was not a tall woman, but lives are not
measured by the distance from the ground to the top of your head. They
are measured by the contribution you have made, the lives you have
touched and the love you have shared. By these measurements, she was a
giant.
Our mother had a hearing problem during the last quarter of her life.
This must have been terribly frustrating for her. In addition to hearing
aids, pocket talkers and rechargeable batteries, she developed some
strategies to get around her challenges. One of them was deciding she
didnt have to know 100% what the question was before she answered it. One
day I was there when her grandson Nigel asked How are you Grandma? She
answered with the now classic line, Oh, in about ten minutes. To this
day, when I ask Nigel how he is doing, I get the same response.
One year my mom and dad came to visit us is in Vancouver. At the end of
my dads life he had almost completely lost his eye sight and my mothers
hearing was very impaired. Between the two of them they could see and
hear but it wasnt always exactly efficient. One night while they were
visting I came home late and my wife told me that my mom and dad had an
argument. She walked into it and my mother was crying because my father
had eaten her batteries. My wife asked a second and third time to make
sure she understood what my mother had said. My mother had taken the
batteries out of her hearing aids and handed them to my father. In
addition to being blind my father also received various medications from
my mother each day. When she put the batteries in his hand he popped them
in his mouth and washed them down with a drink of water. My father with
his great sense of humor said to my wife Rose, I dont know why she is so
upset, I am the one who has eaten the batteries, and Im not sure thats
good for me. After hearing about this incident one of my club management
friends asked me, "Is it true that when you eat batteries you keep
going and going and going and going.
Our mother had a hearing problem and the irony was that her favorite
pastime in life was the art of conversation. She would much rather sit
and talk to someone than watch TV in the earlier parts of her life.
Although it might have been hard to see it in recent years, the world has
lost a wonderful listener. She listened with her ears and with her heart.
She taught us caring, compassion and tolerance. She was a great listener.
Our mother was not very active during the last few years. Her heart did
not allow her to do much before being tired out. But that was not always
the case. She was a woman of energy and although I did not get to know
her as a young woman, I did see the energy she put into being a wonderful
wife, mother, daughter, twin sister, grandmother, great grandmother, aunt
and friend. In the first 8 or 9 years at Kingsville Court a place where
she was supposed to be taken care of she was still in service, helping
out in the kitchen because she wanted to contribute.
Now in heaven, no longer confined by a tiny little body, no longer
suffering with the difficulty of hearing, no longer tired and out of
breath, I would like you to imagine this tall beautiful angel, who is
hearing every conversation, and buzzing around in service like never
before. I hope Dad is ready to hear everything that has happened in the
past 10 years.
Thank you for coming to celebrate the life of our mom.
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